marilu: healthful – and sexy – valentine’s tips
article from Better Nutrition Magazine

VIEW ARTICLE ON BETTERNUTRITION.COM	HEALTHFUL - AND SEXY - VALENTINE'S TIPS by Marilu Henner I always think of February as official sweetheart's month because of Valentine's Day. It's the perfect opportunity to tell the person you love exactly how you feel. I've always been a little bit boy-crazy, so, for me, February 14 is more important than my birthday. My tradition goes way back to second grade, when I gave Tommy Donovan a heart-shaped box of chocolates to leave no doubt that he was the one. And it worked! He told me that I was nice and walked me home from school that day. (That's pretty much a long-term relationship in second grade terms.) I have taken advantage of more than 40 Valentine's Days since (and a few more Tommy Donovans), but I've learned to swap the chocolates with smarter, healthier, more direct artillery such as lingerie.
Most adults, however, are still clinging to that "sweets-for-my-sweet" mentality on this holiday. Perhaps the biggest misconception is that gifts for your valentine should focus on naughty dietary indulgences such as calorie-rich dinners, chocolates and alcohol. We tend to connect bad food and bad habits with romance and sex. And that's fine if what you really care about are candy, booze and cheese fondue. In reality, those wicked treats clash with activities under the sheets. How enthusiastic are you for being intimate when you're bloated, tired, wired or crashing from a sugar high? Being cranky doesn't jibe with hanky panky. (I've got a million of 'em!) We're always bombarded with images from magazines of what looks cool and sexy. We see people smoking cigarettes and drinking. Ads work hard to make things like smoking and drinking look sexy. What else do these vices have to attract you? It's hard to push a product based on its harmful physical and emotional effects, so why not link it to a sexy image? This is the reason we connect smoking, drinking and bad food with sexiness. So, perhaps you skip the romance on Valentine's night because you're too full, tired, gassy -- or you just lose the mood. You wake up the morning of the 15th with an upset stomach that's been gurgling all night from the combination of excess sugar, alcohol and too much dairy. But instead of feeling bad about missing a night of passion, you're actually in search of more sugar because you've already hopped aboard "the sugar treadmill." If you had the willpower to say, "OK, I'm going to indulge just this one day and then stop," that would be fine. But you can't stop, can you? You've already activated all those pleasure pathways in your brain that are addicted to sugar. Those chubby little Umpah Loompahs are already partying big time at your synapses, and there's no stopping them. You just have to keep that huge box of Godiva chocolates your sweetie gave you (to show how much he "loves" you) around for a couple more days, until every piece is gone. And right after you've finished it, you're out searching for another box. Only this time you're not just searching for an innocent little treat. This time you're after the fix . . . the buzz . . . the addiction! This time it's not Godiva, is it? Quality no longer matters. This time it's cheap gas station chocolate concealed in a brown paper bag stuffed inside the pocket of your chocolate-stained trench coat. And it's all because of that obnoxious-sized box of chocolates that your "sweetheart" gave to you -- knowing damn well that it would eventually make you plump enough to fit snugly under his thumb. Food Affects Our Emotions It's not just re-igniting our addiction to chocolate that causes the problems. Foods high in bad fats, sugar and chemicals are directly linked to many negative emotions, whereas whole, natural foods rich in nutrients -- foods such as fruits, vegetables, grains and legumes -- contribute to greater energy and positive emotions. And positive emotions lead to better attitudes and better relationships! Healthful whole foods improve our brain function as well. This was demonstrated in a recent study with grade-school children. After switching to an unprocessed, healthier diet with lots of fruits and vegetables -- and without any refined sugar -- the children's behavior and cognitive abilities noticeably improved. They were much more cooperative with each other and their teachers, and nearly all of them demonstrated improved learning ability. Research has shown that even small amounts of processed food alter the chemical balance in our brain and cause negative mood swings along with noticeable dips in energy. It's difficult to be enthusiastic with your spouse, children, family and friends when your energy is low. The foods that have been found to be the biggest culprits of these negative cycles are refined sugar (found in chocolate), refined white flour, hydrogenated oils, animal fats, processed foods laden with synthetic chemicals and caffeine (also found in chocolate). I know. I know. You're thinking, "Why is she dumping on chocolate, my favorite, and on Valentine's Day, no less?" I'm aware that many studies have pointed out that chocolate (especially dark chocolate) is rich in flavonoids, antioxidant phytochemicals that may help lower your risk for heart disease by reducing platelet clumping in the arteries. However, along with those beneficial flavonoids, you're getting refined sugar, caffeine and hydrogenated oils. It's not worth it. If you want that antioxidant benefit without the bad stuff, eat lots of fruits that are high in flavonoids such as apples, grapes and pears. You don't really need chocolate, and it can be addictive. OK, so if we're not going to eat chocolate and fondue this Valentine's Day, what can we indulge in? Well . . . how about each other? That's what Valentine's Day is really about anyway -- and savoring each other is a lot more fun than gorging on chocolate. Here Are Some Ideas to Help Get You Started Buy special pretty lingerie for her or hot boxers for him. It's easy to find cute combinations and accessories, even in your own closet. This can be really fun to plan because of all the wicked ideas and tasty visuals that pop in your head while searching and planning. Don't forget to use scented candles, too. Remember 91/2 Weeks with Kim Basinger and Mickey Rourke? Take turns blindfolding each other, and then try to identify different items only by smell and taste such as fresh strawberries, honeydew melons or anything else tasty that you know your partner would love. Anyway, the point is to have lots of fun without doing anything harmful to your mind or body. If you really don't want to break from the tradition of a heart-shaped box, buy an empty box without the chocolates, and fill it instead with nontoxic body paints. You can pretend you're back in school, and play arts and crafts. Hmmmmmm . . . I wonder what Tommy Donovan's doing this Valentine's Day? Have a happy, healthy, AND SEXY Valentine's Day!